John Farrell An Unsung Hero of 2007

(Brita Meng Outzen/MLB.com)

In 2006, Red Sox pitching was utterly embarrassing. Their staff ranked fifth to last in ERA and was below major league average in quality starts, batting average against, total walks, complete games and shut outs. Although the Red Sox finished third in the AL East, their pitching staff was more comparable to those of basement dwelling teams.

In 2007, the Red Sox saw dramatic improvement in their pitching staff. Among other American League teams, the Red Sox staff's ERA, WHIP and BAA went from 10th or worse to first. The staff's overall walk total decreased by 27 and their strikeout total increased by 79. Newcomers Diasuke Matsuzaka and Hideki Okajima helped, but for the most part the Red Sox returned the same pitching staff from 2006. Of the 13 pitchers who made significant contributions in 2007 (at least 35 innings), all but two of them were holdovers from 2006.

So what was the largest difference to the Red Sox pitching staff in 2007? I'd like to make the case for new Red Sox pitching coach John Farrell. First of all, I'll provide a quick background on Farrell. Outside of college baseball he had never coached before 2007. He did serve as the Director of Player development for the Cleveland Indians starting in late 2001. He helped the organization to have 2003's top rated farm system according to Baseball America.

He left the Indians organization to become the Red Sox pitching coach last year, and already he's made some serious waves. In Spring Training, Farrell worked with Josh Beckett to help him standardize his delivery. Beckett posted his lowest BB/9 since he was drafted and had a career year at the major league level.

Farrell also worked with new pitcher Hideki Okajima. In the humidity of Florida Spring Training, Okajima had trouble with his changeup. So Farrell helped him to devliver a new grip on his changeup, which would create more movement. The result was the creation of Okajima's split-change nicknamed the "Okie Doke". And against major leaguers in 2007, Okajima had a lower WHIP than he ever had in the 11 years that he faced Japanese hitters.

Under the tutelage of Farrell, young pitchers Jon Lester and Manny Delcarmen also saw positive improvements in their development. I'm not sure if Jonathan Papelbon really needed all that much tutelage, but in 2007 he lead the majors in K/9 innings pitched.

In 2008, Farrell will look to continue the development of young Red Sox pitchers. Farrell has fallen in love with Jon Lester, and seems determined to make the young lefty his next project. But I'm sure Farrell will also work extensively with Daisuke Matsuzaka and Clay Buchholz. And God forbid if Farrell works on Beckett any more, that would just be unfair.

The Michaels Report

Preamble

In the wake of the Mitchell Report, many New York fans and writers have been left with a bitter taste in their mouth. The report named a total of 17 current and former Yankees who used PEDs. And even though former Red Sox fan favorites like Roger Clemens and Mo Vaugn were named, in addition to members of the 2007 championship team like Brendan Donnelly and Eric Gagne, it still wasn't enough.

Mitchell made the critical mistake of not naming enough Red Sox players. Some New York fans have even claimed that the Mitchell Report should be dubbed "the Red Sox Report". New York Sports writer Bill Madden made Mitchell's bias obvious when he pointed out that "not one prominent recent Red Sox, Milwaukee Brewer or Texas Ranger wound up in that report?"

Now I thought George W. Bush left his job with the Rangers. I remember something about him becoming president, and a Republican at that. But you know what, good of George Mitchell, a Democrat, to be bipartisan and keep Bush's 1994 interests in mind. If Mitchell wasn't so biased in other areas, he'd be a great example for our young politicians.

So for all of you who were unsatisfied with the Mitchell Report, I've undergone my own investigation. Now I know I'm not a respected former politician, and I never helped broker peace in Northern Ireland. In fact, most people have probably never heard of me.

I'll leave the accuracy of the report for you to ponder, although I doubt it will be debated on ESPN. I will do the one thing which will make this report legitimate in the eyes of millions of New York fans; I will name Red Sox.

I will not keep you waiting any longer. Without further ado, I present to you The Michaels Report.

Information Obtained Regarding Players' Possession or Use of Steroids and Human Growth Hormone

Jonathan Papelbon: Papelbon was heartbroken when in 2005, the Red Sox made him pitch at the Triple-A level before being called up. He couldn't understand why he wasn't called up after he posted a 2.48 ERA and a 0.94 WHIP at the Double-A level. He decided it wasn't his numbers, but rather his simply wasn't making enough of an impression.

And so, in 2005, Papelbon turned to fellow Baton Rouge native, and hGH user Andy Pettitte for help. Pettitte testified as the the secondary uses of hGH. He himself didn't use them to cheat, but rather to help out his team. Like Pettitte, Papelbon tried out hGH, but after finding that his illegal drug use didn't make him seem like "more of a team player", he turned to steroids.

Steroids Papelbon found an immediate use for. While he didn't need them to bulk up, they gave him a mental edge. And with the help of roid rage, he was able to make his famous "Papelstare". Red Sox scouts immediately noticed Papelbon's stare of pure rage and promoted him to the major leagues.

David Ortiz: Ortiz was released by the Minnesota Twins after his age 26 season, in which he slugged only .500. Ortiz showed promise in the minor leagues, but the Twins didn't feel they could afford him. So in order to make sure he caught on somewhere else, Ortiz invested his fortune of an arbitration contract into thousands of dollars worth of hGH and steroids.



We know Ortiz has used PEDs for a variety of reasons. First of all, he puts up good power numbers and plays for the Red Sox. Second of all, not only does he get walk-off hits, but he does so against Mariano Rivera. Mariano Rivera is the greatest closer of all time. In fact, he's so good that the only people capable of getting walk-off hits against him are Bill Mueller and cheaters.

Issues arose when certain "shrinking" side effects of steroids began to take their toll on the body and ego of Ortiz. In order to battle the damaging mental affects, Ortiz undertook the nickname "Big Papi" The nickname helps compensate for parts of Ortiz which are no longer that big.

Ortiz has previously said the only things he puts in his body to be big are "rice and beans". In the Dominican Republic those are known slang terms for hGH and steroids.

Hideki Okajima: Okajima experienced severe stress on his neck in Spring Training with the Red Sox in 2007. Trainers were worried that if Okajima continued his violent head jerks, his head was in danger of falling right off. So in order prevent that from happening, he began using hGH to strengthen his neck muscles. While hGH use without a prescription is illegal, Okajima swears that his illegal drug use is only for his own safety.

In April Okajima actually admitted to his steroids use, saying he was inspired by Bonds' use in the book Game of Shadows. But his interpreter tried to protect Okajima, mistranslating the statement to say "I'm willing to be a hero in the dark". MLB.com ran a story on the quote entitled "Okajima emerging out of the shadows".

Dustin Pedroia: Not only is he a good player on the Red Sox, but he has a receding hairline as well, a clear indication of steroids use. Besides, no one who is 5'8'' could be good unless they cheated.

Conclusions

It has become clear that the Red Sox have a significant and prolonged culture of PED use. The Mitchell Report demonstrated that various former Red Sox players used PEDs. When Paxton Crawford dropped a bag on the floor of the Red Sox clubhouse, and needles came out, members of the Red Sox laughed.

This is because the Red Sox are cheaters. It wasn't enough to know that Red Sox have used PEDs, peopled needed to know names of current Red Sox players. It was unfair that more Yankees than Red Sox players were named.

And in conclusion, use of PEDs by Red Sox players helps to explain why they've been better than the Yankees lately. No wonder they've won two World Series in the last four years. An asterisk should be placed next to them, and the Red Sox AL East championship last year. Just like the "real" home run king is Hank Aaron, the real AL East Champions are the New York Yankees.

2007 World Series Ball Not Headed to the Hall

So why won't the 2007 World Series ball see Cooperstown you my be wondering? Well, in Papelbon's words "my dog ate it!" That's right, according to Papelbon, his dog ate parts of the World Series ball. Here's what Papelbon had to say about his dog and the incident.

"[The dog] plays with baseballs like they are his toys. His name is Boss. He jumped up one day on the counter and snatched it. He likes rawhide. He tore that thing to pieces." He then went on to say, "I'll keep what's left of it."

Hmmm, his dog ate it? Well, I'm sure something happened to the ball. But after Papelbon's World Series celebration, I'm not so sure that Papelbon remembers it.


And that was before he made a helmet out of a beer box.

Gagne Hits the Road

All is well in Red Sox Nation. Former Red Sox reliever will be donning Brewers blue and amber to begin to the 2008 season. There may not be any celebrations in the city of Boston, but at least Red Sox fans will be able to sleep a little easier.

I'd like to take a moment to thank the Milwaukee Brewers for giving Gagne a guaranteed $10 million to close next year. That's right, those are the same Milwaukee Brewers who let Francisco Cordero go, because Cordero wanted $11.5 million a year. Although, to be fair, Cordero did also want a four year deal.

In all seriousness, Gagne could be effective again in '08. Milwaukee is hardly the pressure cooker that Boston is. And before coming to Boston in 2007, Gagne converted 16 of 17 save chances, with a 2.16 ERA and a WHIP of 1.05. But it's hard to forget what he did with the Red Sox.

So, in honor of this great day, I thought I'd compile some memories of Eric Gagne's short stint with the Red Sox. I guess this could be considered a highlight of the lowlights. And I'm truly sorry to those of you who have tried to hard to forget them.

August 10th vs. Orioles - In my opinion, this was Gagne's defining moment with the Red Sox. The Red Sox had a six game lead in the AL East when Gagne waddled into the eighth inning of a 5-1 game. Gagne then gives up a double, a single and a walk before recording his first out. That would be the only out he recorded, as he gave up a double to the next batter and was removed. He lasted a third of an inning, allowing four runs and blowing the lead. At the end of the night, the Red Sox lead was down to five games.

September 18th vs. Blue Jays - Perhaps Gagne has a fear of birds? Gagne comes into another 8th inning, this time with the Red Sox division lead down to 3.5 games. Try to picture Gagne, with his scruffy face and over sized three-quarter length sleeves coming into a one run game. Gagne quickly retires the first two batters of the inning. Then he gives up a walk, a single, and another walk to load the bases. Gagne then precedes to walk in the tying run, and then give up a double. The double would have scored three runs, if not for a relay throw by Dustin Pedroia that cuts down Greg Zaun at the plate. At the end of the night, the Red Sox division lead is down to 2.5 games.

August 17th vs. the Angels - The eighth inning wasn't kind to Gagne, so why not try the ninth? This time Gagne comes into a close out a one run game. Gagne records a quick first out, then gives up a walk, followed by a single, followed by yet another game tying single. With two men on, Gagne then gives up a double to Vladimir Guerro which allows two more runs, before Gagne gets a double play. At the end of the night, the Red Sox lost yet another game in the Al East and Josh Beckett lost an extra win that could have netted him the AL Cy Young.

October 28th vs. the Rockies - This one is my absolute favorite Gagne moment - most likely because it doesn't involve him pitching. The Red Sox are in the eighth inning of Game 4 of the World Series. And who would you guess is throwing in the bullpen, right beside Jonathan Papelbon? That's right, Eric Gagne. Of course, when Hideki Okajima gives up a two run home run to Garrett Atkins, it's Papelbon, not Gagne who comes in to close it out. But could you imagine if it was Gagne celebrating on the mound when the Red Sox won it all? Now that would be ironic!